Welcome, gay NASCAR fans! WOW! Speedweeks and the Daytona 500 were definitely worth the wait -- what an incredible parade of racing and wrecking! Congratulations to the DeVine 9 1/2's own Jeff Gordon, who got his "Drive for 5" (the quest for his fifth Championship) off to a great start with a spectacular victory in The Great American Race! What a thrill! I've already made my prediction: Jeff Gordon will be your 2005 Champ! Watch and learn, chirren.
I played hooky from work Thursday to watch the 150s from Daytona, which drew 100,000 to the speedway. The day was dominated, of course, by the big wreck Kevin Harvick caused while chasing the leader, Jimmie Johnson, in the second race. Johnson made it out OK but lots of other cars were wrecked and either had to be repaired or replaced with backup cars. In a post-race interview, Jimmie was practically sobbing as he begged Richard Childress to fire Harvick. Someone even chucked a suck-jug at Kevin during his interview, in which he preposterously suggested he had gotten into Jimmie because Jimmie checked up. Now Jimmie was leading in the late laps of a restrictor plate race -- somebody tell me why he would check up?
The scariest wreck of the week was a late-race crash in the ARCA event that left Billy Venturini with some broken bones in his neck -- that wreck is just too scary to watch. Billy was released from hospital on Saturday and will be recuperating at home. Good luck getting well, Billy. The most fun wreck to watch occurred in the truck race. One truck started getting sideways after a bump, then went airborne, did a complete end-over-end flip, and incredibly, came down on all fours racing off in the right direction! It was truly something to see.
But what everyone really came to see was the main event, so let's get to it! More than 200,000 people filled racing's greatest track on Sunday, and the weather was truly gorgeous. The run-up to the show was so protracted that many fans, I'm sure, were face-down in the dip, an empty 12-pack at their feet, by the time the green flag dropped. Most bizarre was the "Tribute to America," which opened with Clint Black. Next up was Brian Wilson, who delivered a frightening rendition of "Good Vibrations" while some cute "surf dancers" cavorted in front of the stage. (BTW, in case you've wondered about picking up Brian's "Smile," -- don't. Yeah, it's famous because it took so long to finish, but don't be fooled -- sometimes when you sit on something for 30 years, you end up with a mess, not a masterpiece.) Then finally, there was Vanessa Williams, singing first "America the Beautiful," then the National Anthem. It was great to hear these patriotic gems being belted out by a woman we've all seen busting out naked and getting busy with another chick!
At this point we must pause to honor the service of the Rev. Hal Marchman, who served as Daytona International Speedway's chaplain from 1959 until his retirement this year at age 85. We will miss this kindly gentleman, and we wish him many more years of health and happiness to enjoy Daytona Beach. The new chaplain, the Rev. Tim McNeil of the Genesis Counseling Center at First United Methodist Church of Ormond Beach, wisely maintain the Rev. Marchman's tradition of keeping his invocation to 25 seconds and ending with an inclusive "Shalom and Amen!"
Finally, at 2:10, the green flag dropped. Hurray! Pole-sitter Dale Jarrett had nothing for nobody, surrendering the lap 1 lead to Jimmie Johnson. Mikey took the lead from Scott Wimmer at lap 20 and held on for more than 40 laps -- yeah Mikey! Bobby Labonte's tore-up car brought out the first caution at lap 14. The yellow next flew for a multi-car banger set off by Ricky Rudd's bad tire. (Many tire problems at DB -- Goodyear has some splainin to do, Lucy.) By lap 99, hard-charging hottie Jamie McMurray had raced up to 3rd. Greedy Kurt Busch tried to steal it from Jamie but got hung out to dry. The third, fourth and fifth cautions were brought out by debris on the racetrack. After the sixth (also for debris), we had a restart at lap 159. With 40 to go, the seventh caution flew for poor Mikey, who blowed up good and was very upset in the interview after the #15 NAPA Chevy went behind the wall. Next, Kasey and the #11 of Jason Leffler went for spin. With 32 to go, Leffler and the #14 got together.
Now the cars were within their fuel window to make it to the end, so there was lots of two-tire, four-tire, fuel-only, no-stop calculating going on. After the restart with 28 to go, Jeff Gordon got serious about getting up front. With 18 to go, we had the afternoon's biggest wreck, touched off by Greg "Biffle Got 'em" Biffle! Eleven cars were involved in this crash, but wait, there's more! At the restart with 13 to go, we had another big wreck before most of the guys even got to the stripe! There was some radio chatter about whether the #8 of Dale Jr. might be "laying back" on restarts. But with seven laps to go, Jr. jumped out past the #20. This set us up for bonus laps, and Gordon held off the bad fast #97 of Kurt Busch to take the checkers. Go #24!
We have to wonder... could Jeff's new paint scheme be to credit for his super finish? During qualifying, the reporters reported that Jeff's car was not wrapped in one of those large computer-printed decals that are now standard -- rather, it had been painted all over with a new paint invented by Dupont especially for his ride. The theory was that this might make for a somewhat faster ride at DIS, where areo is everything. We don't know if that paint scheme gave the #24 the advantage, but it obviously didn't hurt him any!
RUSTY'S LAST CALL --
DW'S LAST FALL!
One of the pre-show segments on Sunday featured Darryl Waltrip interviewing the retiring Rusty Wallace at Rusty's home. The two strolled through a horse pasture or something reminiscing about life on the track as sentimental violins cried softly in the background. Then DW ventured to ask RW whether his stamina might be "giving out," and RW responded by throwing a body-block that knocked DW to the ground and they both rolled around hollering. I have no information about whether DW might still be recovering, or whether in fact he was on a walker with a nurse in attendance Sunday.
BETTY JACK IN THE PRESS!
I usually wait to crow about media coverage until after it happens, but wanted to go ahead and tell you to be on the lookout for little ole me in an upcoming issue of Entertainment Weekly! This sassy mag's charming Mandi Bierly interviewed me extensively, asking about all the gay fans and so forth. I tell you, just between us girls, a couple of the reporters who have interviewed me in the past have been as clueless about NASCAR as I am about computer repair. But Miss Mandi, honey, she KNOWS her NASCAR and totally gets it as far as why it's fun. Look for her article previewing the 2005 season in Entertainment Weekly (check weekly -- next issue is March 4).
GNARLY DUDES!
Now sweets, y'all know that the front-row in the speedway of my heart is always occupied by Kasey Kahne on the outside and Jamie McMurray on the pole. Imagine my delight Sunday when FOX did a filler piece before the race showing Jamie and Kasey out in Hawaii taking surfing lessons (of course, on boards that were decaled exactly like their Cup rides)! They were great -- Kasey hopped up on his first wave, while it took Jamie a bit longer. By the end of the piece, the guys had been renamed "Big Kahuna" Khane and "Moon Doggie" McMurray. Jamie kept his shirt on, but Kasey had his off during the interview, and he has some nice, surprising chest fur! Sweet! Mandi from EW said Jamie was scared because he doesn't like deep water, but got over it directly with the help of super-surfer Kelly Slater.
AD WATCH
Just as "ball-heads" anticipate the parade of commercials produced for the SuperBowl, "gear-heads" await the ads designed to debut in the Daytona 500. Two of Sunday's funniest spots involved Dale Jr. and Mikey on a mock "shopping channel" type set, where they got all girly ooo-ing and ahh-ing over various car parts available at NAPA. This is even funnier if you've ever caught any NASCAR guys on QVC's "For Race Fans Only," where they do the exact same thing, only about crew jackets and toy cars. Despite whatever tensions exist between Jr. and Mikey, their chemistry in commercials is always fun.
MELLOW OR MANIC?
Jr. was almost unbelievable mellow in his pre-race interview Sunday: When asked how it was going for him, he seemed to forget all about his ride, commenting happily on the infield atmosphere and the Bethune-Cookman marching band! An announcer gently steered him back to the topic of the race at hand, and he seemed to give a car report almost from a mental script. ("Yeah, we got a fast car.") He repeatedly stressed how relaxed he is with his new crew chief, Pete Rondeau, who he said is also very relaxed. Jr.'s appreciation of Pete's style suggests Jr. might have felt yelled-at once too often by former crew chief Tony Eury Jr.
At the exact opposite end of the mellow scale was Matthew McConaughey, who followed Jr. on the pre-race show, and man! Talk about wound up! The notoriously fun-loving grand marshal was unshaven, wearing dark glasses and chomping gum 90 miles an hour! Maybe Matt had volunteered to help fix one of those rides Harvick wrecked in the 150 and he'd been up since Thursday! And let's just say nobody ever hollered, "Gentlemen, start your engines!" with any more crazy energy! (The day's other star turn went to cute Ashton Kutcher, who waved the green flag at lap 1. That looks like so much fun!)
SO GONZO, NOW GONE
Just a word appreciation, and sorrow, and good-bye, to the remarkable Dr. Hunter S. Thompson, who checked out of life on Sunday. A whole generation of writers were temporarily blinded, and forever influenced, by his genius "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas." And for a menacing account of US presidential primaries before they were scripted (and fixed at the top, by both parties?), ride along with Hunter in "Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail '72." We will miss this shocking, bold mad-man -- a great howler monkey, a truth-teller, a voice crying in the wilderness.
Finally, I want to welcome back www.nascar-racetickets.com ticket service (no relation to the big guys, y'all!) as a season sponsor of Gaytona.com! These dudes offer excellent tickets to many events; the prices, like the tickets, are premium, but if you want the best, this is where to find it. Check them out today, and thank them for helping keep us on the 'Net! If you have a business or offer a service, drop me a note and let me give you a great deal on an ad on Gaytona.com, for a week or the whole season!
That's it for this week, racing buds and babes. It's time to head West -- we've got reservations at the Hotel California! Let's all meet up down at the Track Bar!
Love,
Betty Jack DeVine
E ME at Bettyjack@bellsouth.net
