"THIS IS BETTY JACK DEVINE, AND I APPROVED THIS MESSAGE:"
Welcome, gay NASCAR fans! Defending Coke 600 winner Jimmie Johnson on Sunday dominated at Lowe's Motor Speedway, driving his Lowe's Chevrolet to complete dominance over the competition. Jimmie's weekend got off to a most excellent start when he was lucky enough to run last in qualifying -- a most happy coincidence, since the growing shade dropped the track temperature about 20 degrees by the time he ran, virtually guaranteeing a faster run for a good car. And Jimmie did have him a good car -- he was way out in front many times on Sunday. Still, doesn't it look just a little odd when the Lowe's car wins at the Lowe's track two years running? Hey, I'm just saying...
This week, our DeVine 91/2 fantasy team put six guys in the top 10. In the points, we've got eight of the top 10 plus the 11th and 12th places. If the season-ending chase for the championship were to begin now, all our guys would be within the 400-point range except Mark Martin and Michael Waltrip.
I've got to stop right here and say congrats to Mikey on a great race. He started 12th and advanced himself very quickly. Mikey finished 2nd, though he never led a lap. It was great to see him up front where he belongs. Mikey has a new NAPA oil filter commercial with Jr. that's a nice companion piece to that leather furniture ad. You know the one I'm talking about: Mikey, dressed in his NAPA firesuit, is just going nuts over this fabulous leather furniture in his home, and at one point there's an overhead shot of him sprawled out on the sofa in a most porny pose?
I was disappointed that there was no invocation this week. A military song stylist did "Amazing Grace," but I personally still think a prayer is in order before the NASCAR race. This was followed by a 21- gun salute, "Taps" and a flyover by some helicopters. Singing the National Anthem were the American Non-Idols -- you know, the ones that got cut. Then a major general was introduced to say the four most famous words in motors sports, but instead he talked on about Memorial Day and this and that, finally tossing it to a live satellite hookup of some of these lonesome soldiers in Iraq, who gave the command at last. Oh, and I almost forgot the Stealth bomber flyover.
Sunday's race was all about long green flag runs, and chasing Jimmie Johnson. Elliott Sadler was best at that -- he and Jimmie swapped the lead many times during the afternoon. At lap 44, Mark Martin cut a tire and wisely came in before it went flat. Lots of people had hopes for Mark, as his most recent Cup victory was at the Coke 600 in 2002. After green flag stops had cycled through, Mark was still looking good in 4th place. In fact, we had a lot of guys far forward on Sunday, but most of them never got to see much more than the back end of that Loew's car. In the next round of green-flag stops, Robby Gordon (who'd run part of the Indy 500 earlier in the day) had trouble getting into his pit box. The caution finally came out when Johnny Sauter hit the wall.
The next caution flew when Greg Biffle got loose and shimmied like a hoochie girl for just a bit. I thought it was amazing that this warranted a caution at all, but hey, it was that kind of a race! The third caution came at lap 338, when Ryan Newman bumped the #1 of John Andretti, sending him spinning and sliding, though Andretti masterfully saved his ride, which was painted a gorgeous candy apple red! Caution came again at lat 351, this one our favorite, Caution Debris! It was later confirmed that this debris was an ice bag most likely thrown intentionally from a car whose driver wanted a caution! But NASCAR was not able to ascertain who did it - althought the FOX announcers were quick to assure that it was not thrown by Kurt Bush, the recipent of the lucky dog pass. If you ask me, I think NASCAR did it to get another restart! I mean, how bad could running over an ice bag be for a racecar, anyway?
A Derrick Cope-caused crash at lap 368 brought out another caution. Jamie stayed out, giving us hope he would win again at Charlotte, as he had in 2002 when he got his first Cup victory there while filling in for Sterling Marlin! Jamie got off to a good lead. But then Ryan's car blew up, bringing out the yellow, then red, flags. We had a restart with four to go, and Jimmie ran away with it. Suspicions about the extremely coincidental nature of the Lowe's car winning at the Lowe's speedway were so rampant that even the Charlotte Observer's Tom Sorensen addressed "all you grassy knoll types." But he admitted, "If NASCAR were going to fix the Coca-Cola 600, it would have attempted to make the race interesting." Ouch!
KASEY KAN!
USA Today ran a special racing section in honor of the weekend's festivities at Charlotte and Indy, and their Friday edition featured a gorgeous front-page picture of Kasey Kahne! The article inside argued that Kahne is the "next Gordon." There are interesting links between the two: Kasey grew up as a big Jeff fan. And just as Jeff's family moved from California to Indiana so Jeff could get more into racing, Kasey and his older sister Shannon moved, without their parents, from Washington to Indianapolis when Kasey was 19 so he could get mo' better rides. Go Kasey! The article explores his enormous popularity: "His deep blue eyes and chiseled facial features wouldn't look out of place in a J. Crew catalog. Kahne coyly insists he doesn't know why he has so many female fans, 'but that's fine with me.' Says [Tommy] Baldwin, his crew chief, 'He's a bright, 24-year-old, good-looking kid that has no girlfriend and is full of promise. I mean, sheesh. What girl wouldn't want to be his fan?" To which I can only add, YOU KNOW THAT'S RIGHT!
NASCAR GETS MAGIC
I enjoyed the recent announcement that Magic Johnson will co-chair NASCAR's new Executive Steering Committee for Diversity. The best part was Magic saying, "I'm giving my time because I want to see more minorities in this sport." Now everybody loves Magic -- but GIVING? Honey, I'm so sure Magic Johnson is not GIVING a damn thing to NASCAR -- and if he is, he needs immediate counseling!
Anyway, it will be fun to see what Magic does for racing. And I couldn't help but notice that none of the coverage of his announcement mentioned his HIV infection. That's certainly progress. (Maybe I need to send my resume to Magic. I mean, I know NASCAR. And I'm sure enough diverse...)
Thanks for stopping by the trailer this week friends. It's nice to be with you again -- I took last week off from writing because the All-Star thing was not a points race. If you missed, me, thanks! I'll see you next week for Dover -- Let's all meet up down at the Track Bar!
Love,
Betty Jack DeVine
E ME at Bettyjack@bellsouth.net
